11.30.2009

Happy almost Birthday to me...nah let's just skip it

I am not one of those people that remind everyone their birthday is coming up in a month, then a week and then daily for the next week till the big day. I never have been. I don’t think I ever will be. The “strange” thing in my family is that there are many of us that share the same birthday. I know weird, huh?



My father, myself, 3 cousins and a very dear friend of mine all share the same birthday, December 1st. The joke was that I was born on my dad’s birthday so I was his birthday gift. LOL The funny thing was my dad was always the one to let everyone know his birthday. It was more of a joke than anything, but it was funny. Although we shared the same birthday most of our birthday celebrations were geared around him. Not to say I didn’t have any birthday parties for me, but the majority of them seemed to be more for him. I remember a few of my “parties” but they were when I was a child. I have never had one as an adult, which is fine.


So my father passed away 5/11/08 after a very long illness. Last year my birthday was a bit difficult so I really expected thought or hoped it get easier each year. Well, this year seems worse. Is it just me? Will it get any better? I don’t expect the pain of missing my dad to go away completely, but I guess I thought it would start to get a little easier as time goes on.


Happy almost my birthday… and it so doesn’t seem like my birthday. It doesn’t feel like it is my birthday, or even close to my birthday. It feels like it is just another day, nothing special that is for sure. In fact I think I will just stop “marking” birthday anyway… I mean what good is it anyway.... except to mark that you have gotten another year older. And let’s face it what fun can that be, another year older?


Ok... I am well, I will be (12/1) 38 freaking years old. I never thought of that as OLD…but I tell you I sure the hell feel old. I mean I guess if I was healthy I wouldn’t feel old but with the way I have been feeling and having such bad flare days lately, I really have been feeling OLD.


So no more almost birthdays or birthdays for me... what for??? But hey, we can always celebrate your birthdays, because I love to do that!!  I am good at that!  I can decorate and bake and plan things for other people really well!! 

3 comments:

  1. Hi, and happy (belated) Birthday! I'm sorry about your Dad. They say time's a healer and it's true, it never goes away, but it will get easier. I just hit 38 too this year (boy, did that hurt???!) so I can totally relate. But I've started to think that maybe when I'm 50, 60 70 I'll wish I'd made more of those younger years when I was a slip of a girl at ONLY 38!!! I think we should celebrate each year, another year we were lucky enough to be here on this earth.

    Thanks for popping over to see me :O)

    Have a fab week,

    B x

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  2. So, am I supposed to wish you well, or not? :) Happy B-day, bloggy bud! SITS sent me by, and I'm glad they did...

    Pretty Darn Cheesy!

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  3. Wish I had some magic words to make it all better (in this life, today) but I don't.
    The only magic words I can offer are Jesus Christ... If you are HIS and He is yours then one day you will have complete healing. Yes, I know the next life seems so far away, and relief now would be wonderful. But know there is hope for a better day--free of pain, sadness and sin. Best of all eternity with our Lord and Savior.
    Your tenacity, strength and will power is an encouragement and quite impressive to those around you.
    Love ya

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