I know why they have glass partitions…

Mom had a physical therapy appointment this morning. Yes we arrived late, but only 6 minutes late. At Kaiser there is a “rule” that when you check in for PT (physical therapy) you should not have to wait. There is a special window and if you are checking in they are suppose to skip right to you. The appointment was at 10:30, and we arrived at 10:36. When I got to the window there was someone at the window being helped and 2 other people waiting. I smiled and let the lady behind the window know that I was there to check someone in for PT. She told me to just a moment. I was surprised because according to all of the therapists this is NOT the way it is suppose to work. She is the only one there, so what else can I do. While I am waiting I realize that the person she is helping at the time is someone who is checking in for LAB work. There is another person at a window next to her for that. OK. Whatever. She finally finishes with her and moves on to the next person, which happened (luckily) that the 2 people were together; but they were scheduling appointments for the next 2 weeks. Yes, this took awhile. When I got up to the window I told her I was checking in for PT and the appt. was at 10:30 and that I know I am a little late. She said you are 20 minutes late it is 11:45. Excuse me but to me that would only be 15 minutes late so she was adding on another 5 minutes just for the hell of it? Oh God help me on this one. She told me we were going to have to reschedule this appointment. I was like are you Fucking Serious? She told me that the appointments were scheduled every 30 minutes and it wasn’t fair to the therapists. I asked her to please call back and ask the therapist if she was at least ok with taking mom and to let her know who it was. Because mom had a complete replacement and she has had some major complications and just got out of the hospital again, she is what they consider HIGH RISK and a HIGH PRIORITY. She decided to lecture me a little longer to add more time on I guess. I finally convinced her to call the therapist and wouldn’t you know it, but the therapist couldn’t see mom, she was right. OH... btw she didn’t tell the therapist that it was Mom, she forgot. OMG!! Do they just let anyone work there? I mean come on now. Really???

So she offered to make another appointment for mom on Monday to make up for this missed one. I explained to her that we were already scheduled for Friday afternoon and that if I wasn’t mistaken the way their system worked if you missed an appointment or cancelled an appointment you couldn’t “make” an appointment up after the fact. She agreed with me but thought that it would make me feel better!!! I said if we did make the appointment would we be able to use it, she said I don’t think so, you are probably right you should just wait till your Friday appointment and see after the evaluation and when they want to see her again. Here is the best part… She asks me if I want her to print out when the next appointment is so that I know what time it is so that I can be there on time. OMG!! I swear there had to be smoke coming out of my ears. There just had to be. I literally took 2 steps away from the counter, I knew that if I didn’t I was going to come over that glass partition. It wasn’t going to stop me, not at this moment. I kept taking deep breaths. I smiled really big so as not to say anything too horribly and said, No sweetie, I know when the appointments are. In fact I knew that today’s appointment was at 10:30 it is just that I was not aware that the Kaiser clock was now 15 minutes fast. I guess I am going to have to set at least one of our clocks according to a Kaiser clock. She said I am not sure what you mean. I know I had to have had the strangest look on my face. She was American so there was NO language barrier and she was not blonde (that is always my excuse anyway), so I am not sure what in the hell was wrong with her. Maybe she woke up on the wrong side of the bed? Maybe she hasn’t had any sex in a rather long time? Maybe her in-laws are staying with her and she can’t stand them? Maybe she is a drug addict and needed a fix? I mean really there are a whole lot of “Maybes” if you think about it…

So by the time I got done with her it was only 10:55 am which would now make us 25 minutes late for the appointment when ironically when I first arrived to check in she was telling me that we were already 20 minutes late. Let’s face it we all know all of the above BS didn’t take only 5 minutes to transpire. Let’s just I have already sent an email to member services…I mean did you really think I wouldn’t have?

I had always wondered why they felt the need for a partition between the workers and the patients… well let’s just say this is a perfect example as to why they have them. They need to ensure the safety of their employees, because I am POSITIVE that I am not the only one that has thought of doing that or maybe even attempting it.


I finally get it

I don’t know if there are many “only children” out there but I am one of them. I mean well kind of. I wonder if that is like being kind of pregnant. My father was married previously and had 2 children but we were not raised together. I know them and they are my half sister and brother. But like I said we were not raised together and we are such opposites. I finally met them when I was 11 years old. That is an entirely other blog or 2 or 3 but anyway, I can always remember my parents wanting me to know them, get along with them and be like sister/brother with them. They never wanted me to be an “only “child. They wanted me to know my siblings and have them in my life. I could never really understand it. I mean I liked them and all but I was raised as an only child and never had a problem with it. I was never one of those children that begged my parents to have a child so I could have a brother or sister.

NO I was NOT spoiled. Ok… I was spoiled with LOVE. I never had everything and anything a child could ever want, I never went without anything though. I started working at an early age and I could go on, but actually that is good for another blog (will have to make a note of that).

For years when I would hear horror stories of sibling stuff, I would turn to my parents or whomever and say, “And you wonder why I not upset with being an only child?” LOL But it is true. People would ask me about being bored growing up or what it was like. It was fine. My mom and I are very close and as a family we were pretty close as well.

I lost my father in May 2008. It hit me harder than I ever expected. Don’t get me wrong I knew it would bother me but it hit me harder than I would have ever thought possible. Then since my father has passed it seems that my mom has been hit with a shitload of health issues. It seems that while she was caring for dad she was able to suppress or push all of her issues down far enough so that there really were no issues. So she seemed to be ok, she had a few issues while he was towards the end of his illness but for the most part she was pretty good.

It wasn’t 2 weeks after Dad passed and it was like her body fell apart and big time too. It was like all of a sudden her body and mind knew they didn’t have to do it anymore. They didn’t have to put on, and her whole system just fell apart. Since then we have been running back and forth to the doctors and to the hospital. It is pretty funny scary when the firemen/emt/ arrive and they recognize you. Hello!! I am pretty sure this is not the norm for most people. Or when you go to the ER or a certain floor of the hospital and they recognize you or mistake you for an employee. Yeah… that happened…a few times.

On March 22nd, Mom went in and finally had her total knee replacement. She has only been waiting for this since …are you ready?? Yup… 2003. Please don’t get me started on that one. She had some minor complications. She came home for almost 2 weeks and then was rushed back because of a pulmonary embolism . That is NOT a good thing. Can we just say that that scared the holy crapola outta me. People thought that once she was released that meant that her blood clot was gone. WRONG!! She still has it and will have it for a few months. After further research, I found out that not only does she have a blood clot in her lung but also some in her leg where she had the surgery. So needless to say I am a bit concerned.

The last thing I want to happen is to lose her. She is all I have. Don’t get me wrong, I have other family, cousins, aunts, uncles but no one lives close. We have some family here in California but the rest is either in the East or South (that is where the siblings are at). It starts to hit me that she is all I have. Not that there is anything wrong with that... but WOW!! I mean WOW!! After a week in the hospital she was released. She started doing pretty good. Her knee was healing pretty well. Her walking was getting better. She needed less and less help, the physical therapists were thrilled with her progress. Yeah!!

Then I had a couple of bad days (Really bad LUPUS flare days), so I slept a lot for 2 days. It bothered me but I did. I kept waking to check on her but since she was “feeling so much better” she was trying to do things. My personal feeling is that she did a bit too much. Who am I to tell her that… she sure the hell isn’t going to listen to me.

Saturday I had to go out for a few hours. I am talking Mother Hubbard… we had NO food and the animals didn’t either. I had to at least make sure the animals had something to eat! So I left her for 3 ½ hours. She was resting. I had her all set up. I had left her previously and not for long amounts of time. I knew that she was tired because of her over doing it the day before even though she wouldn’t admit it, but I knew it, because I know her. So I called and checked in on her about 3 times. She was fine, resting and all.

When I arrived home, I found her PASSED OUT on the toilet. At first glance I thought she was trying to be funny. But when I said to her “not funny”, she didn’t move at all. I knew, OMG!! Ok... Actually I was thinking FUCK... FUCK... FUCKFUCK!!! When I finally aroused her she was confused and barely coherent. I knew her sugar had dropped and was not sure about her blood pressure. I wanted to move her to either her bed or the recliner love seat. I basically was moving her. She is not a tiny person but not a large person, but she was dead weight. She basically had no control over herself. We made it to the dining room table. I tested her sugar and it was 30! I tested her blood pressure and it was 98/45. I knew I had to raise both of them. I proceeded to try and raise her sugar. At first she would take a drink or a bite but then she clamped down and wouldn’t eat or drink. It was kind of funny but not. I had to call our friend over to help me get her to her bedroom, because by this time she was even less coherent and was not being cooperative. Clarence came over (Thank you Clarence!!) and helped me take her to her bedroom. I tried for almost 2 hours to get her numbers to come up. They barely raised. I knew it was not enough. I had to call 911. I know how she hates the HOSPITAL. Oh well it had to be done.

During this entire time I kept thinking OMG!! Not now… I can’t do this. I don’t know if I can keep doing this. I get this now. I finally get why parents don’t want their children to be “alone”. I never really thought much of it before…but it hit me after her bout with the Pulmonary Embolism and then again now. When I saw her passed out like that, it was a feeling I hope I never have to feel again. I tell you I will never leave her alone again. I had just talked to her on the phone 30 minutes before I arrived home, so I know she couldn’t have been passed out longer than that, but still, what if??? What if???

The emergency guys came and yes they recognized me and mom. So they immediately gave her dextrose and got her sugar to raise to a normal level (Thank God!!) and then it was off to the hospital. After many tests it was now determined that she is now HYPOGLYCEMIC and also has CELLULITIS. They want to keep her over for observation. Cellulitis is an infection. It can be very dangerous. Not only does she have this in the leg she had surgery but she has it on BOTH legs. Her legs are so swollen you wonder why they haven’t burst yet, and they are so RED, you wonder if they are 3rd degree burns.

I think to myself –How could I have let this happen? First the Pulmonary Embolism, now the Cellulitis. I tell you I don’t think I will be able to leave her alone for awhile to come. I know the doctors say that it is ok, but in my heart, mind and soul, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if GOD forbid something happened.

Here I am… not married, no children, not in the best of health and it is just me & mom. I finally get why my parents, my mom especially has always been so adamant for me to embrace the fact that I have siblings.

For the simple fact that I wouldn’t be alone...



I still can’t believe I did what I just did. Ok... well maybe I can. So I admit it, I have a million things on my mind and am trying to do everything with keeping an eye on my mother at ALL times. I haven’t blogged about my mom’s latest “vacation” but here is a quick update. She had her total knee replacement on 3/22/10 came home for 2 weeks and was rushed back with a PULMONARY EMBOLISM only to have to be home for 10 days and have to be rushed back again (Sat night) for CELLULITIS and HYPOGLYCEMIA. I will go into that whole ordeal in another fun filled blog.

Anyway.... so I have her back home and settled and am trying to do a few things. You know, feed the animals, give them their meds, feed us, get her comfortable, look at her new meds and see how she needs to be taking them, answer the phone that seems to be ringing off the hook and do some laundry.

Laundry… So the other day I had thrown some towels in the washing machine and didn’t get to them right away. I had forgotten about them. So today I took a look at the laundry and not that there was a lot but I thought I should at least do some. So I remembered that there were some towels in the washing machine and I put in the detergent and made sure the door was closed (front loading), I looked inside and started it up. So when it was finally done, I opened up the dryer threw in some bounce and opened up the washing machine to find it completely EMPTY! I was like, WTF!! So here is where my blonde moment kicks in. I literally look all around inside the damn washing machine as if I am going to find the damn towels. Hello??? I know I know... most people lose socks, I lose entire loads. I am thinking WTH??? I can’t believe I wasted the time, water, soap, energy, did I say time?? To wash not a FUCKING thing! So I get the load that was supposed to be my 2nd load and throw it in the washer and get it started. I go back to mom and tell her what I just did. She finds this humorous and is like, “You don’t remember doing that load the other day?” No Ma, I don’t if I had I wouldn’t have done it AGAIN.

As you can tell I have everything under control.


You know it is bad when…

So today mom had to go to physical therapy and to see her primary care doctor. We do NOT have the same insurance or the same doctors. However, I have taken her to her appointments for years (she does NOT drive) so they all know me. Basically I think that is why my mom keeps me around…a free chauffeur! At least that is what I have been accusing her of. Ha ha

Physical Therapy was first. Melanie (PT) came out to get mom and of course said hello to me. She came out a bit later and asked if I was alright. I really didn’t look good. Oh Gee thanks for noticing! I gave her my usual answer, “I’m fine, How are you”. It is just easier. I mean let’s face it who really wants to hear the truth? I mean hell I don’t want to hear the truth! When mom came out she took one look at me and said you feel like shit don’t you honey? Poor baby! Ok!! Excuse me!! She is the one that just had the total knee replacement and was rushed to the hospital with a pulmonary embolism , and here she is telling me I look like shit. (Truth be known yes I felt like shit. And yes I did look like shit. I mean I scared myself when I looked in the mirror. I fixed my hair and put a little bit of make-up on and yet it still looked like I packed enough luggage under my eyes for the entire neighborhood. )

Now it was time to see her primary care doctor. He is a funny guy. He is still young and green around the collar. He is a total germ phobic. It is really funny to see that in a doctor. I mean he always wears at least 1 pair of gloves and if he is going to touch you anywhere, he adds either 1-2 more pairs. It is hysterical, but he is a good doctor and does his job well. As soon as he comes into the room he greats us and I can feel that he keeps looking over at me. Towards the end of the visit he remarks at how well mom is looking and to keep up the great work. Then he turns to me and says, I know I am not your doctor, but is there anything I can do... you look horrible, I mean (now he has realized what he said so now he is tripping all over his words, funny really) you look like you don’t feel well, I mean if someone didn’t know they would think it was you that was the patient and not your mom. I mean, umm, that is not coming out right. What I am trying to say is, take care of yourself while you are taking care of your mom. Don’t forget about yourself in this process.

Nice… here I am the “caregiver” and everyone thinks I am the patient. Great! Ain’t that nice?

So the last straw… I decided I couldn’t handle the pain and everything else, so I called my rheumatologist to see if I could come in for a shot. I hate to do that but I did. They were able to take me. I walked in and the front office and the nurse both commented on how bad I looked. They had never seen me look that bad!

Ok! People thanks for the ego boost! I can’t wait to do this again!!!



Ummm......yeah....ok... Can you just imagine how many accidents this must cause while driving down the road?  It made me take a second look! Wouldn't you?


Please Shoot Me NOW

It has been a little over 2 weeks since mom had her total knee replacement (tkr) surgery. The knee seems to be healing fine. She is able to walk ok, well with a huge amount of pain but other than that ok. She has other health problems so we knew the recovery time would be a bit longer than most. She also has COPD . So unfortunately she also has to wear oxygen 24/7. The past year had been tough because of all of the pain she had been in with her knee, so we were really hoping, wishing, praying that once she got her knee fixed her breathing would ease up a bit. She wouldn’t be in so much pain and it wouldn’t be such an extra stress.

So the last 2 days (today (4/9) being day 3) she has been having an EXTREMELY difficult time breathing. She is ok while she is still but as soon as she starts to move, she can’t catch her breath. She is exhausted and gasping for air. The thoughts of my father flashed before my eyes. I remembered how he struggled for his breaths, at times even when he was not moving. I thought to myself this is not supposed to be happening. Mom is supposed to be getting better. She is not supposed to be suffering from this now. I called to see if I could get her in to see her pulmonary doctor, well he is out of the office until her scheduled appt (15th), so I tried her primary care physician, guess what, he is out of the office too. I am not doing very well here. I figure here physical therapist is suppose to come by today (4/8) and I am hoping that she will take a listen and hopefully I am just making it out to be worse than what it is. She sounds very congested and I just want to make sure she doesn’t end up with an infection or pneumonia or bronchitis, especially with her having just had the surgery and all.

So Nancy (PT) arrives and I tell her how she has been doing. Nancy does exercises with her and when she is done she comes to see me as usual. She asks me why have I let this go on for so long? This is day 2 of her breathing problems. I was floored. She said I should get her in to see her M.D. right away. I explained to her that I had tried and was not successful. So she then tells me that if something does happen to please remember to call 911.


Could she have made me feel any worse? Can I just say she did a damn good job whether she was trying or not.

This morning mom had her appointment with her orthopedic. The staples were to be removed. They were and her knee looks really good. I have pictures that I will show on another post. So he asks if we have seen her primary care doctor. I explain to him that I was unable to get an appointment with her pulmonary or primary care doctor. He asks why I haven’t taken her to Urgent Care. I explain to him that Urgent Care (Kaiser) is no longer a walk-in facility; you need an appointment and I was hoping that since we were here to see you, that maybe you would check her out and see what you could do if anything. He proceeded to tell me that he is NOT a medical doctor but an orthopedic SURGEON. He also told me that he doesn’t know where I got my information from but that it was WRONG. Urgent care is open and is a WALK-IN facility. He then says, I thought you were a good care-taker, what happened? You need to take her to the walk in clinic right now and get this taken care. I thought you of all people would understand how serious this is.


He says he will have his nurse call the walk in clinic and call ahead for us to be able to come over right now if that is what we want. Guess what??? You CAN’T do that. You can only make SAME DAY APPOINTMENTS. There is no WALK IN clinic so to speak. Well, if you want to wait till 5:30 pm there is. Ok... so at least I didn’t have that messed up.

So on our way home, I called our local office (SCV) to see if there was something that could be done. They were able to do a same day appointment with a Dr. Azimi. We went right over there. They took us and started to check her out. Her oxygen saturation levels were at 82%!! Even though she is on oxygen she is normally around 96%. Needless to say they were a bit worried. They started working on her like crazy and then Dr. Azimi decided they were going to call an ambulance to transport her to the Kaiser Panorama Hospital. Mom is all “I am not going to the Hospital”. God love her. I get she doesn’t like the hospital. I get that every time she goes in she is in longer than what is expected. However, she needs to go in this time. Then as they are doing more tests, the Dr. decides they are calling 911 as she feels they can’t wait for the Kaiser ambulance to get here and transport to the valley. She wants her in the hospital (even though it will be an out of network hospital as that is the closest one) now. The Doctor then tells me that if this ever happens again don’t wait like I did this time and call 911 right away!!


The EMT, Paramedics, Firemen arrive. So they start asking all of the usual questions. I just about know them by heart (sad but true). They asked how long this had been going on, what meds is she on, blah blah blah. Then not to leave them out… they had to ask me why did I let this go on for 3 days? What was I trying to do? I am a smart ass at heart. However by this time I was pretty well beat up. I was pretty convinced that they were/are all right… I obviously haven’t been taking good care of mom. So even though I thought of several smart ass come backs, I barely managed a smile and said not one fucking word.

They took her to the ER. I climbed in my car and for the first time ever I did NOT follow her to ER. I went home. I sobbed the entire way home. I have had 4 healthcare professionals tell me in less than a 24 hour time period that basically I have NOT been a good care taker. This kills me in ways no one will ever understand or get.



Animal Pictures with my words (this is fun)

So a friend of mine sent me an email with these pictures in it.  Great pictures.  However, I have this habit to "say" what I think the animals might be saying/feeling.  So here goes...

I am just going to keep drinking and pretend I don't see you.  Because I am sure I can't be seeing a baby porcupine.

Do you see the look on my face?  Do I look cute and cuddly now? That's right, I didn't think so.  Remember that.

(Before I say anything about this pic- I have to say that this picture is just SO WRONG in so many ways!!)
He says have you taken enough pictures? Are you happy? I suppose you are going to post this on your Facebook page or email it to all of your friends? I am glad you think this is "So Cute".  Remember this ok?  Because tonight, when it is quiet and you are all asleep and comfy in bed... just beware is all I am going to say. 

I don't remember any of the other children getting this big but I still love him, he is my son.

OMG!! Check out this fish I just found.  Dad!!!  Come see what I caught us for dinner!! Holy Cow!

What? Hmmm?? What do you mean I shouldn't be in the blinds? My big brother is right here, I am sure he will take care of me.  (Big brother has that cheshire cat grin, and says "of course I will " in a sarcastic tone")

Ummmm... uh... ok thanks for the help.  I appreciate it.  Now that I don't have to take a bath for the next week. Thanks, but next time, I got this covered.

Did you see that? What? Huh? Oh Crap I missed it again.  I always miss it.

Yours always tastes better than mine.  Why is that? 

I don't know how in the hell this happened.  SOS

No this is mine. I am not giving it to you.. ok ok. I will break it for you guys this one last time but you's are going to have to share this one.  Then you have to leave me alone. ok?

ZZZzz- I just need another week of sleep and then I think I will be able to go back to puppiness.  I tell you, being a puppy is some serious business.

This stuff is great.  I wonder what it is.  No one will even notice where I have taken a bite out of this.  Hmmm....I wonder how much I could get away with eating...

Holy Crap!! OMG! What just happened?  I had not idea this thing would swing like that?  Aren't you going to help me instead of just standing there and taking a freaking picture of me? 

OMG!! I just wanted to get a closer look at the fishies -ya know to make sure they were ok and all.  I was concerned about them.  I can't believe I fell in and all the way in too. Now I am all wet and stinky smelly too.  and Do you hear that? I think the fishies are laughing at me!! Are you gonna help me outta here or just stand there making sure you get this damn picture?

Oooooooohhhhhhhhhh!! This feels sooooo good.  The water is so perfect.  The sun is nice and warm. Oh.. and my toes, ahhh this feel so great. I think I just might stay in here all day.  This is the life.  Wanna come in and join me?



So as most of you already know, my mom had total knee replacement surgery . The surgery went well but she unfortunately had some complications afterward. Anyone that knows mom knows that is actually “normal” for her. Almost immediately they were unable to get her pain under control. We all know mom has an extremely high tolerance for pain. She was experiencing a pain level at about an 11. NOT GOOD. So while she was in the hospital they were trying their best to keep her medicated and somewhat pain free. Let me just say they weren’t doing a great job of it. So I wanted to make sure that when she was released they sent her home with something good. I knew I was going to have to work for this.

I know you are going to think I am such a drug addict or something (I am not… I mean I don’t think I am), because I know all of the names of so many narcotics and which is stronger than the other and so on. Let’s just say I have been around the medical field for awhile. I worked there a long time (a looong time ago) and try to always keep myself up to date with what is new. Heck, I am the kid that asked Santa for a PDR for Christmas one year (and yes I got it!).

Anyway after having to remind the nurse what Mom is allergic to (vicodin) and what pain pills do and don’t work, they seemed to be at a loss as to what they could or would send home with us. All I can say is thank goodness I have been around this block before and know to be prepared. Thank goodness I already had narcotics at home so I was able to start medicating her right away. Well they would only prescribe Percocet 10-325 (which really isn’t all that strong) and 1 every 6 hours. Before she had surgery she was taking 2 and it didn’t touch the pain, now they think 1 every 6 hours will do the trick? Whatever. I started her off with 2 about every 4 hours. The pain was still out of this world and not getting any better. So then I started adding morphine (just 15 mg) in between to try and piggy back it. Still that wasn’t working. I finally found something. I have her on 30mg morphine and 1 Percocet –she gets that does 3-4 times a day. I know some of you are probably freaking out. Sounds like a shitload of drugs, right? The way I look at it, is if it is finally relieving some of her pain, then it is SO WORTH it. My mom has a high tolerance for pain and she needed something to take the edge off of it. I informed her surgeon and he was ok with it (a bit surprised) but glad that something was helping. He even wrote me another Rx for the Percocet but not the Morphine. He never gave us those, but just to let everyone know, they were prescribed by a doctor just not him.

So she has been on this regime of pain meds and all has been going well. Well wouldn’t you know it but on Saturday night for some reason it really affected her differently. It was funny. Talk about wasted. OMG –freakin hilarious. Makes me wish I had the video camera going, but then again, we all know I am twisted but I would never do that to my mom ( at least not where she could find out that I did it). Ha ha She could barely keep her eyes open and she kept dozing off and while she was falling asleep she would be playing with her oxygen tubing and then all of a sudden start talking to me about something that I had no clue what she was talking about. Then she would kind of wake up and realize what she was saying mid sentence and say to me, What did you say? Why did you say that? After awhile I couldn’t help but laugh out loud at her. God I love her.

I actually had plans to go out (I know I know… can you believe it?) on Saturday night for a short while and I was kind of concerned about leaving her. I was worried that she would be disoriented and try walking or something. The last thing I needed or wanted was for her to fall. I had 2 neighbors checking in on her and I called her a few times. She was ok. No falls, just still pretty wasted. Too funny I tell you.


Online Ordering is MY personal HELL

I am sure everyone has ordered something at some point in their life via online. It is suppose to be the latest and greatest thing. You know it is suppose to save us time and even money. Really? I never have a good outcome with online ordering. Is it just me? Am I jinxed or do you suffer from this HELL to??

Why is it when you need to go online and really need to order something( and I mean need to, because you really need something to be somewhere, not the ooohhh I really like those shoes, and would LOVE to have them), the website always freezes?
I don’t mean it is slow…. Oh nooooooo that would be ok... it fucking freezes. Now you already have 1 thing in your cart but because of it freezing you have to do a reboot. Gotta love doing that. So now that you have done that, and you finally get it back up, you have to find the damn thing you had in your cart all over again. Because you know it is not in the cart anymore, because it was lost, how, we have no idea, especially since you were logged in with you user id and password. Don’t you just LOVE technology? Please remember how much time this is saving you? At least that is what I keep muttering under my breath so that I don’t throw the damn laptop out the window. (deep calm breath, those are supposed to help, so I am told, I’ll let you know when/if they do).

Why is that after you have finally decided what you are going to purchase online and send to your friend/family it is out of stock?
This has to be a conspiracy, I mean right? They must do this on purpose. Have the best stuff and then make sure they don’t have enough in stock or enough in stock for the needed holiday. (deep calm breaths…still not helping, but I haven’t thrown anything out of any windows yet)

Why is it that they advertise they will ship for free or upgrade you but for some reason your order doesn’t qualify?
 I don’t care what the fine print says and let’s face it we all know that fine print can get pretty damn small when they need it to. But they make sure their shipping prices are inflated out of this freaking world.

So now that I have spent way more time than I ever fucking imagined possible to just send something to a friend/ family, I wonder why the hell didn’t I just buy something and package it up myself and mail it off to them. Oh... wait… that’s right, this was supposed to be more efficient, easier, so that I could be in the comforts of my own home, do it when I wanted to, save money and time. Hmmmm…. I don’t think any of that happened. I ended up ready to throw my laptop out the window (on more than 1 occasion), I was in tears a few times (because everything I planned to buy was suddenly not available, therefore causing me extreme stress in having to choose something else), it took more time then I imagined and caused me to not get everything done that I needed to get done in a day(ironing, dusting, washing clothes, vacuuming, washing floors, making meals, cleaning outside, taking care of mom, the animals) and I still came away empty fucking handed. YUP!! You guessed it. Nothing was ordered.

Am I the only one this happens to ?