3.31.2010

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY(well almost)

Mom finally had her total knee replacement surgery. Here she is right after surgery in the ROM (range of motion) machine. She loved that(says in a sarcastic tone).



 This is Mom's knee on Day 4. The first time the bandages were changed. Cool huh? To think the surgeon actually told mom that the incision would only be about an inch long. He must have been on some pretty good drugs when he told mom that one. LOL





3.28.2010

Running…running…running…

(First let me preface that I slept on the couch the night before so that I would make sure that I heard mom in case she needed anything…. needless to say if she inhaled loudly I heard it! So let's just say I am a little more tired than normal, if there is such a possible thing with me. Better safe than sorry.)


10:00 am -Alarm goes off (OMG – it is time to get up already – CRAP!!!)
Let Tee-Tee out
Check on Mom
Help mom to beside commode
Help mom back to bed
Let Tee-Tee in
Make ice (No we do not have a refrigerator that makes ice – yes I know that SUCKS!)
Chip is now walking around mewing (ok, screaming for someone). The older he has gotten the more he seems to do this. He has become a very vocal little boy.
Get mom and ice bag for her knee
I finally get a chance to go pee now
Phone call
Pick up blanket/pillow from couch, put away
Take food out for Chip & Tee-Tee
Open blinds throughout the house – Welcome World! (Ok I am trying!)
Give mom her glucometer so she can check her sugar
Get mom a fresh glass of water with lemon in it with her morning pills
Clean Chip’s litter boxes plus a little sickness he also had in the spare room
Prepare Chip and Tee-Tee’s breakfast
Give Chip both of his liquid medications then his breakfast
Phone call
Help mom to beside commode
Help mom back to bed
When Tee-Tee is done eating, give her insulin, and 2 homeopathics, and wipe face
Let Tee-Tee outside again
Phone call
Mom is not really hungry but needs to eat a little something.
Refills mom’s glass of water
I at least get to brush my teeth, wash my face and brush my hair.
Clean one of Chip’s litter boxes b/c with my luck it is a mess.
Took trash out
Get mom to bathroom
Help her wash up a bit
Wash mom’s glasses
Straighten her bed
Help her back to bed
Get mom and ice bag for her knee
Phone call


2:00pm – Home health/PT arrives


PT has TONS of paperwork to do… ugh… it is ridiculous. She is actually here for 3 hours. Some doing paperwork and some actually with Mom doing exercises and evaluating.


2:30pm – Fed lunch to Chip and Tee-Tee
Let Tee-Tee out
Let Tee-Tee in
Make ice


3:00pm – Take a shower. A nice HOT shower. I took a quick one b/c I figured I would be needed soon. And sure enough, I got out, dried off, got dressed and came out to check on them and the aide had some questions for me.
Phone call


3:30pm – we are both HUNGRY and I have decided that mom has to eat a little something so that she can take some more pain pills.
Give mom her glucometer so she can check her sugar
So I fix us each a half a sandwich and give her, her after noon pills and some pain pills. We both inhale our food, as neither one of us like eating in front of other people. Thank GOD I fed her (us) considering she didn’t leave until a little after 5 pm – we would have died from starvation – don’t you think? I am sure of it! Anyway for a few minutes, I sit at the table, pull up a chair and put my legs up and for a brief moment, it was like aaaahhhhhh. It felt so good. That was until I heard, “Ummmm, Tammy I have another question for you.” So my Aaaahhhh moment was short lived but it was wonderful.
Let Tee-Tee out
Refill mom’s water
Phone call
Help mom to commode and back to bed
Cleaned up after lunch
Got mail
Phone call (anyone noticing that the phone calls seem to come at the wrong times???)


5:00pm- PT/Home health left!! Don’t get me wrong, Nancy was very nice, but you know how it is to have someone up in your house like that for over 3 hours having to do paperwork and all. UGH. She will be back 3x’s next week and 2x’s the following week. Then we will have to go to the outpatient PT/
Get mom and ice bag for her knee
Make ice
Phone call
Helped mom to bathroom and back to bed

6:00pm - Dinner time! Normally we don’t eat this early but we are starved.
Neighbor dropped by to check on us her
Give mom her glucometer so she can check her sugar
Made dinner for both us and Chip & Tee-Tee
Got dinner and pain pills & meds for Chip & Tee-Tee (notice how we all need meds? I know SUCKS right?)






Truthfully I could go on till probably about 2 am… b/c you see she isn’t tired yet. :) For some reason the day seemed to drag on for her. So I have her set up in bed, playing the Nintendo DS (yes you heard me right, she loves that darn thing, and let me tell you, I am thrilled she does), and in a few minutes I will help her to the bathroom, and give her another dose of pain pills and hopefully she will want (operative word) to go to sleep. Otherwise I might just have to knock her out so that I can collapse for a few hours. Because let me tell you. Since I slept on the couch last night to make sure I would hear her, and that I did, I heard everything, Tee-Tee getting a drink of water, Chip playing, Chip using his litter box, and even when the ice bag fell out of her bed and I came into her room to see what was going on, I woke her up! Ha ha I know right?


So…although I am running…running…running…and I hate the fact I don’t have the energy and the stamina I did a few years back when I could have done all of this and 10x’s more and think nothing of it, I wouldn’t have it any other way. I am so Thankful & Blessed that I am here and well enough to do all that I can do for her. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I am so lucky to have her for a mom.

3.24.2010

So how was my day you ask?

To bring you up to speed my mom was scheduled to go in on Monday 3/22 to have a total knee replacement. She had herself so nervous and worked up into such a tizzy that the morning of her surgery her sugar had dropped to 40. She is diabetic and it would figure that on the day of her surgery when she is NOT supposed to have anything to eat/drink her sugar drops to 40. So I had to give her a little sip of OJ. Ok... so I will fast forward. She had the surgery. The surgery went well (yeah!). However, knowing my mom there is always complications somehow someway. She was supposed to have a spinal and it didn’t take, so they did the general and yet there was still something wrong. Right after surgery she was AWAKE and in PAIN. Did I say she was in a lot of pain? She was in so much pain that post-op didn’t allow me to come back for 2 hours. Well at 2 hours, I basically told them I was coming back. They tried everything, Darvocet, Percocet, morphine and nothing was giving her any relief. I suggested Dilaudid as she has had that before and it seemed to work. This drug is much stronger than morphine but you must be careful as it sometimes makes the patient forget to breathe. They moved her to DOU (definitive observation unit) instead of on the regular floor as she needed to be watched a bit closer. The dilaudid was able to bring her pain level down from an 11 to a 7 but only for about an hour at a time. After emailing and calling all doctors necessary last night at 10pm. This morning she finally was put on a better regime of pain meds.


Percocet – 2 tabs every 2 hours
Dilaudid – 2 mg every 3 hours
Morphine any time if she needs it


Also my cat, Chip is really really sick. So he was suppose to have another dr. appt this morning.



Ok… so how was my day??



My alarm went off at 9 am (considering I had an extremely long and exhausting day before this felt like the crack of dawn). I hit snooze and then realized that I couldn’t move. Not because I didn’t want to or because I was tired, it was because I was so freakin exhausted I literally couldn’t lift my freakin’ head off of the pillow. I finally drug my exhausted fat ass outta bed and proceeded to feed the kids (Chip & Tee-Tee), get myself cleaned up, and return a few phone calls. So my dog, Tee-Tee is diabetic and wouldn’t you know she decided that today she is going to go on strike and not eat what I give her for her breakfast. Geesh??!! Really?? Can’t you just help me out a little here? I would really appreciate it. So then I go outside to get Chip’s carrier out of the shed and just put it on the porch. That little shit sweet little boy must of have somehow heard and he ran and hid. UGH! He positioned himself in such a perfect spot under mom’s bed there was no way in Hell I was going to get him. I begged him to come out. I tried bribing. I did just about everything. At that point, he had won. I told him he won, and he didn’t have to go. I gave up.


Still Tee-Tee is on strike from eating. Now just like humans if she goes too long without eating, her sugar can also drop too low and she could go into sugar coma. Great!! That would just be perfect fucking timing. Ya know? I sit down to take a breather, because from being on the floor I am outta breath. Tee-Tee is sitting at the front door like she has to go outside, so I go over there and open the door for her and she runs away and hides in mom’s room. Ok…hello? What was that for? Can anyone please tell me? I didn’t yell, or get physical or violent, so why the hell was she hiding? (Big heavy sigh)

I call and check on mom, because by now it is noon and I still haven’t seen mom yet. This is very upsetting to me. Her nurse comes on the phone and tells me she is “fine.” What? I explain to her that I was there with her yesterday/night. Unless something major has changed I can’t imagine her just being “fine”. I mean if so great, but if that was the case, mom would have called me. So I finally get it out of her that her pain management has been changed to the schedule I mentioned earlier. I was like ok… glad to hear it. So I knew she had to be feeling a bit better but I knew she wasn’t “fine”. UGH!


I figure I will eat something before I go and see mom. Tee-Tee still refuses to eat. I finally end up giving in since it has been so long now and give the little spoiled brat  princess something else to eat. She devours that (of course). I mean we all knew she was freakin’ starving to death. Chip is still unsure and runs from mom’s room to my room. I put some food out for him and try to reassure him that he is safe for now. He is not going to see Tracy so he can relax.


And then I slump against a wall to the floor and realize that this is just the beginning of my day. I am looking for the white flag. I am ready to throw in the towel, wave the white flag, do whatever I need to do, to make it all stop.


Then I drifted off for a moment and thought…how in God’s name did I use to do this? When mom was in the hospital before, I took care of both animals kids, Dad, the house, worked full time plus and would visit mom in the hospital and do whatever there that she needed. Now I can barely do what I am doing, and I am so freakin' exhausted and can’t hide it. I hate that when I walk in mom’s room, she can see it on my face immediately that I am so exhausted. I used to be able to hide it (or at least I thought I did).

3.18.2010

Chip is sick...

Chip(my cat) just had a thyroidectomy . This was just done on 3/5/10, so it wasn’t that long ago. So we were told to bring him back 2-4 weeks for post-op check. Well he hadn’t been doing all that good so I brought him in sooner than later. He has lost 14 oz in 2 weeks (wish I could lose weight that quickly), not good. He is not overweight. He has wanted to eat constantly and seems to be going to the bathroom a lot. I mean he seems to be going like the runs. Can you imagine if you had an upset tummy and were going to the bathroom like that several times a day for 2 weeks? No thank you! That is how he is doing right now. Also, if you remember, he has pretty bad arthritis, so he seems to be limping pretty bad as well. He is downright lethargic and his heart is still racing. We had thought that taking the thyroid out would have made the heart calm down. NOPE. Of course I couldn’t have been that lucky. Course then again, this is the cat that within a few months of having him, he was nicknamed the million dollar kitty. In the first year of his life he had to have sub-colonectomy. I know, huh…that is a mouthful, for sure.

Dr. Tracy the best Cat Dr. in the world took blood and has suggested that we have an ultrasound of his heart and gut done on Tuesday. She called this morning with some of the results and told me that the liver looks like it is under stress. YIKES!! So didn’t want to hear that. Hopefully tomorrow the rest of the results will come in and she will call me, as she is away from the office at a Vet Convention. However, because she is so AWESOME, she does these types of things. And for that I am so grateful.

We discussed some of the possibilities that this could be and the possible fixes:


1. He could have heart problems and may need to be put on a heart medication. So that would mean me giving him medication. Now, please remember that he is already on 2 other medications. So it is like another medication for him? UGH. I feel bad for the poor guy.


2. The other thing is it might be gut problems or IBD/IBS. The normal medication that would be used for that, he is allergic (Flagyl) and the other is steroids (which is NOT good for heart conditions).

So now I am watching him closely. I talked to him on the way home from the vet and asked him how he felt and tried to get a feeling from him. I mean I know he is in pain. I hate it. I hate that with all of my being. This is when I wish he could talk. So I wonder if he is in too much pain. But than what is too much?  I mean everyone has a different threshold for pain.  I personally think he shouldn't have to have any pain.   Does he want to be here or not? I wonder if I am thinking this way because I am in so much pain and feel like crap so much of the time and wish that I had a way out at times, that maybe I am projecting it onto him? Nah, I’m not that damn miserable, at least not yet!

So I wonder is it worth putting him through the ultrasounds on Tuesday? I don't want to put him through anything unnecessary. I don’t want to put him through anymore surgeries. I don’t want to add anymore meds to his list. BUT I DON’T want him to feel like crap and suffer any longer than he has to. Does that sound awful? I am torn completely and utterly. He will be 12 yrs old in May.



So I ask… What would you do??


3.16.2010

She says it is a sickness…

My mom is a perfectionist. I love her. I guess being raised with that, it kind of rubs off. I can laugh about it sometimes. Other times I have to walk away or on the really bad days I might even end up crying. I know it sounds horrible right?



She always has to have everything in its place. I get that. The joke growing up was that anyone that would come over to the house could move something ever so slightly and she would notice it immediately. I am not kidding. Her brothers and other friends and family would move things and make bets to see how long it would take her to notice and move things back into “their right” place. The right place was the place that she placed them.


We live together. She has some health problems. Currently she is waiting to have a total knee replacement. So at this time she can barely walk. Did you get that? BARELY WALK. She hobbles around the house if she has to get around the house and when we do go out, and that is only for doctor appointments she has to be in a wheelchair. So needless to say at this time, I try (to do my best) to take care of everything or just about everything. I know I can’t do everything the way she would do it or the way she would like it, and I accept that. BUT…when she can barely walk and goes hobbling around and “redoing” things, it just about kills me. I mean, really?? Is that really necessary??


For instance, she has to refold the towels, because for some reason they are not folded right. Don’t get me wrong, they are folded in the same tri-fold manner that she taught me, but for some reason, I guess they are not perfect, so she feels a need to refold them. She does this always. (People say I am the sick one because I can tell when she has refolded the towels. That is a whole different story, right? We are not going to make comments about that here, today, right?) I make her bed, and yet she still has to “straighten” it. Really??? There are no lumps; the comforter is even, is it really that bad? I have all of the trash from all of the trash cans in the house emptied into the main one and have it tied and ready to go out tomorrow morning. She found trash somewhere and had to open the trash bag and add the trash to it, reclose it and move the bag into the laundry room. A different place from where I had it. LOL She couldn’t have just put the trash in one of the trash cans? I can clean Chip’s (our kitty’s) litter box and yet she can come along minutes later (I am not kidding you) and re-scoop it and “smooth” it out. She won’t find anything but she still has to do it. WHY????????????


So am I over reacting to this? I can handle it most of the time…but then there are those times when it just gets to be too much and I just feel like no matter what I do or how I do it, it just isn’t good enough. Ya know?


So although it is her sickness, it still makes me sick. Although she says she cannot help herself, and she tries not to do those things, sometimes I just can’t help myself when I feel so worthless.

3.10.2010

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY

Chip - This look says it all

Tee-Tee is eyeing a pretty yummy treat.

3.06.2010

These wings were not made for flying

So do you ever find something you like and then end up really liking it to then end up finding out they no longer make the damn thing? It seems that happens to me every single freaking time. It is really getting old. Then it throws your whole ritual off. It is like you have to start all over, from scratch. Sometimes it is really difficult to find a replacement let alone it be even close to comparable. So here it is…

Now before I go any further this just may be way TMI (too much info) for anyone, so I am giving fair warning. I wear pads when it is “that time of the month”. I do not wear tampons. I just can’t do it. I tried once and it was a horrible experience. You ask what happened. Ok… since you have twisted my arm I will tell you this story but it will be between just you and me. OK?

It was summertime and I was with my best friend, Tania. We are only 6 months apart in age and were basically raised like sisters.  So it was planned that we were suppose to go to the beach with her church group. Well don’t you know but I started that day. Now this is unusual because at that time I was regular, every 24 days…you could calendar it, and it was spot on (sorry no pun intended). So I figured I would just wear a pad and NOT go into the water. Oh NO…she would have none of that. She talked me into trying a tampon. I had no idea what I was doing. I was young probably around 11 years old. I can remember looking at the pictures of the “how to” on the back of the box.  If only there was something like this back then, maybe I would have succeeded, just maybe..I was in the bathroom and she was standing at the door, asking me well, do you have it in yet? Are you ok? I hadn’t even tried yet, I was so freakin nervous. Finally I worked my nerve up and did it. It DID NOT feel right. But then again, how did I know what would feel right. I had never had anything up there. To me at that time in my life that was strictly an exit only area! LOL So I decided to let it stay and be uncomfortable in pain. Tania told me that it would “settle” after a short time and I wouldn’t even feel it. I was wondering how long it would take for it to “settle” before I wouldn’t feel it. Whatever it was, it wasn’t quick enough. So we carpooled to the beach, get there, set up and everyone wants to go in the water. Finally I go…now here it is… are you ready??? Yup, I think you guessed, as we were in the ocean all of a sudden something just didn’t feel right and then I had no pain and for a brief moment I was thrilled that it finally “settled”, only to see that it was floating right by me! Talk about mortified. OMG!! I wanted to die. I thought for sure I would. I didn’t. So that is why I don’t use Tampons…ever. I have still dreams vivid nightmares about that horrific day.

 



So I wear pads. I know, old school, but that is me. Now you know why, so you won’t have to try and convince me to try it again. Oh HELL NO!! I am simple; I just like the old school pads. You know the regular ones…you know the ones you can practically never find anymore. WTF!!?? I normally buy them at Target, because their brand is the cheapest and they work really well. And if you remember from my last post cheap blow job I don’t like spending money on myself. So they don’t make them anymore. Can this be for real? Can you believe that? So I was in that isle for what felt like forever (probably close to most of that day) and still couldn’t find what I wanted. So of course I had to settle. What did I settle for… pads with wings! Really? Am I the only one that doesn’t get this concept? Please tell me a man thought up this stupid ass idea.

You stick the pad to your panties and they stay. If not, you have the wrong type of panties on, and you need to go back to your lingerie drawer and find another pair. SIMPLE.The wings are suppose to “wrap around” and stick. Let’s be realistic here. They don’t stick. They don’t stay. They come undone and stick to you, either your skin or your little hairs down there. I don’t know about you, but I don’t find either of those areas fun places to have something sticking to it. Especially if I am out and about and all of a sudden I feel this pull and tug, and I can’t even do anything until I can get to a restroom. See, so a man had to be the evil one to come up with this “great” invention, right? I mean what woman in their right mind would think this is a good thing? Or am I missing it completely??  




3.05.2010

Now that’s a cheap Blow Job!

Truth be known I hate spending money on myself. It is true. I would rather either save it or spend it on someone else. I have no problem spending the money on my mom or on the kids (nieces/nephews) in the family. That never bothers me, I actually enjoy it, but on something for me… I always try and find a way to put off having to spend the money on me.


The other day I was using my blow dryer to dry my hair. I started to realize that my left hand (the one holding the dryer) was feeling rather HOT. I switched hands and checked out my left hand and it was bright red, and as soon as my right hand touched the blow dryer I realized it was rather HOT. It still works good. I mean it dries my hair. It is a Conair 1600 mid size blow dryer.

My mom and I were talking about it and I realized it that I have had this for a rather long time…more than 10 years. I guess I got my monies worth out of it, right? However, in my mind it STILL WORKS! Funny thing is, if this was moms blow dryer I would buy her a new one immediately. I would want to make sure she had a safe blow dryer.



Later in the day I was at Target picking up a few things, you know those things, the things you can’t live without. So anyway I thought I would at least take a look at the dryers. When I first looked all I saw was blow dryers priced at $29.99 and up. My first thought was oh hell no! I don’t need a dryer that bad. I was thinking to myself what else does it do for that amount? I was like OMG, prices sure have gone up. LOL However if it would have been for someone else, I would have looked at them, priced them out and figured out which one was best suited for the individual and get the best one not taking the price into consideration. Please remember this is for me, so that is not how things went. Then there it was …


Conair 1875 Watt Low Cost Dryer - White : Target

Almost like nothing I have ever seen before (ok well in a really long time anyway), a Conair blow dryer, midsize just like mine at home. Same color and everything! The best thing of all … the price… Yup, you guessed it; it was only a freaking $9.99!! Can you believe that? That is like a steal. I mean remember what I was telling you about the others? A cheap blow job! So I caved and bought.



I got it home and opened up, all proud of this great new find. I go to get my old jalopy out of my bathroom and I was surprised even more. My old dryer was 1600 watts, this new state of the art one was 1875 watts!! Woo-hoo!! Not only did I get a deal, but I got more power. More bang for the buck!


Yup, definitely a Good Blow Job!!

Thyroidectomy

Chip - Before Surgery 


My cat son, Chip is 11 years old and has had thyroid problems. We have had him on medication that I have to give him orally twice a day. Thankfully he is pretty good at taking his medicine. However, he does have Jaws of Steel. Most recently he has been having heart problems. His heart has been racing and even with increasing the dosage of his medicine it did not seem to help. So it was decided that he needed to have a Thyroidectomy.



He goes to The Cat Dr. They are really great there. I feel fortunate to have her as his Doctor and the staff as well. So he was scheduled to go in today for a Thyroidectomy. Thank goodness they called early afternoon to let me know he came through with flying colors. He was a good boy and was already asking when I was going to be picking him up! I of course dropped by later in the day to visit him.

 
The visit was nice. He looks really good. I also ended up having his teeth cleaned as well. Poor guy had to have 2 molars extracted. His canines were still good, and as we all know those are the ones that attract all of the cute girls! I mean that is what the Doc told me!! As soon as he heard me, he went to the front of the cage and was ready to go! It was really cute. I was allowed to open the cage up and pet him. He wanted to get out of that cage and bad too. I really had to work hard at keeping him in the cage. Even after the surgeries he still is strong as ever!


He let me take some pictures of him…although he wasn’t too thrilled about it. Normally he loves to model but I can understand considering just having had surgery and all. I know he was wondering where the hell was I going and why wasn’t I taking him with me. Put it this way, that is sure what the look in his eyes were saying. Well, actually they were saying a few other things but I didn’t want to actually say those things because I don’t want everyone to know that my son sometimes uses that kind of language. I promise you it is not on a regular basis. I am sure it was the pain medicine that caused him to use that tone and foul mouth.

He should be able to come home tomorrow.  I told him that Grandma, Tee-Tee(our dog my sister) and I really missed him and couldn't wait till he was home.  I apologized for not being able to bring him home tonight but told him tomorrow will come quickly.  He then gave me a dirty look and the paw! 




Chip - He really wasn't into posing for pictures.

Chip - In his cage after the surgery.

Chip - Finally a somewhat decent picture

Chip - Isn't he adorable? You can see he is still attached to the IV

3.01.2010

Elastic Waistbands and Comfortable Shoes

Ok... not long ago after I found SITS I also found Noelle @ Elastic Waistbands and Comfortable shoes . She is not only a great blogger, but also a great person. I have fallen in love with her blog. It was easy to do, trust me. I am sure if you go over there, you will fall in love with her blog and her too. I don’t see how you couldn’t actually. There is something about the way she writes that brings you right into her living room and heart. I totally understand get her jokes and her sarcasm. I love it!
Here is my problem…right around January I started having a problem going to her site. Now this is just wrong in so many ways. I have tried everything. The only way I am able to get to her site now is by going to her blogger profile page and clicking on the link of her blog. Then once I get that to open up I can read what is on that page, but that is it. It will not allow me to go to anything else on her blog. I can’t read her “about me” or “meet my kids” or “my weight loss journey”. Can you tell I am going nuts? Ok… maybe I already am nuts! You don’t need to weigh in on this question.  I miss reading her blog. I have emailed her and she says that no one else is having this problem. I thought the web address I had was incorrect.


http://elastic-waistbands.blogspot.com/ This is the address that I get sent to when I click on the link on her blogger profile page. At least if I go to this address I can read that first page. However, if I try to do anything else, it then causes my internet to go into (Not Responding) mode. Do you know how upsetting and frustrating this is? You might say you know…but do you really? Have you ever had something like this happen to you?  If so please tell me you know how to fix this.This blog is a plea to anyone out there for help. I have asked some of my “computer geek brainy ” friends and I am not getting any help from them. Humph! I miss reading all of her blogs.  It seems that this is the only site I am having a problem with... well the only site that I care about.  :)